They ask well meaning
I’m fine I lie
Hiding the truth
Of a heart shattered
Not only for the total loss
But what has driven me
To destroy a love
I had but now gone

That bloody PTSD leads
Down an unmanageable path
Hurting those even close and loved
Regrets piling up
To make a mountain of grief
Layer upon layer
Creating a mountain unassailable
Of terrible pain

All the blessings counted
Don’t seem to balance out
That madness in the mind and soul
The breathing in of the salty air
Provides temporary relief
But disappointing at every turn
While the heart burns

Guilt adding up
To create a huge stone
Too heavy to carry
Wondering why it has to be this way
Where to find the release
To let it all go
Hoping after troubled sleep
It will seem different in the morning????