Phillipa Hollenkamp
Conjola
4 February 2021
Seeing our story
Up in lights
Tears well up
I don't feel right
My heart beats fast
Pounding my head
Breathe the count
To relieve the dread
To see our General
And hear his words
His heartfelt love
His dedication, cause
We lost our soldier
His family too
We should be angry
With those, the few
I cannot dwell
On other issues
I have my own
Many a fissure
The film is true
It explains to all
I feel relieved
I need not recall
Justifies my heart
My head as well
The year that was
I struggled in hell
Our work at home
Is far from done
I see no end game
For me, no sun
I need to change
To see some worth
It will come, I know
I'll repair my earth
So thanks my Ash
You told it well
The slog still hard
The lake, the spell
We're not forgotten
Its hard but true
Learn from loss
Now that's true blue
The Cost
5 February 2021
The dulcet tones of the chainsaw
Breaks the cacophony of cicada
Worshipping the heat
The winds have felled
Yet more of the tree
The dead, the dying, the dangerous
More work to do, the list is endless
The willing hand, the empty purse
The excavator roars to life
The generator adds to the din
The shovel, the saw
The crunch of timber
The man-made fire
Continues to consume
Our time, our money, our minds
The acres of wire and wood
That need repair
The hedge, that retaining wall
My willing neighbour
Always at the ready
Helping with the load
I wish to join the fight
And help restore what's left
But work with self employ
Prevents my time at best
The weekend is all I have
For effort, sweat and grime
The mess, the weeds
The scorn of it
The many tree to replant
Its a funny thing
You work to live, live to work
I'm not sure what I do
I need time for it
To restore what's mine
I need a load of sleep
I want it back, as it was
Before my time was taken
By the beast, that is
That was
Disheartened
10 January 2021
Disheartened
Disgusted
Dismayed
The healing has sown
Bitterness, venom
Hate
Selfish
And the
Selfless
Yet another home
In ashes, gone
A family broken
From consequence of others
Blindly following
Self belief
My own sadness
Now amplified
Eternally ashamed
You can reject my sorrow
I see your hurt, pain
Your tears
I will wear the shame
For them
My shoulders are strong
I hope your hearts are full
You have plenty to give
For those willing to receive
Thankyou for your
Service
Tears for no reason
30 December 2020
Tears for no reason
With reason for tears
What was, what is
A year is past
Souvenir and relic
Idle reminder
Like yesterday, my
Smoke tainted heart
Tears prick the eye
The weariness
Of the soul
Deeply ingrained
Community divided
Once firmly clutched
In its bosom
Hearts remain crushed
Tears for no reason
With reason for tears
A New Year
2 December 2020
The landscape blackened
Darkens my soul
Dampens the spirit
Shadows take hold
Twisted bare limbs
Clawing the sky
Tortured are thoughts
Were never a lie
The moment recalled
As stood in that place
Fear on hold
Must run, keeping pace
Enveloping, racing
It's puff was a roar
Consuming , taking
Enough was now more
Won't be long
I plead that's for sure
I need to rest
I can go no more
Holding that tear
Pricking my eye
Keep working, working
Be brave or you die
Vision is gone
Body weary and weak
Rest in the car
Solace, so bleak
We must go on
Check the others
View the carnage
Help our brothers
The remains still evident
The scars, wounds deep
The work endless
The toll, so steep
I fear we are lost
The world's gone mad
Things, more urgent
My all, I am sad.
Us
2 December 2020
We saved our home,
My fathers cottage,
Our lives we have,
Seem now, forgotten
We have our shed
Our life treasures too
Stowed in depths
Once, measured true
Surrounds are gone
Tree line drive of year
Majestic growth,
Now mulched I fear
The meticulous hedge
That well kept lawn
The feature trees
My god, they're gone
Boundary fence
Charcoal and wire
My wedding arbor
Fuel for fire
The day it was
Straight from hell
We fought so hard
I remember it well
My fathers tractor
Burnt, abandoned, gone
Orchard devastated
The land, it's gone
The cattle scorched
Their bellies bloated
The bleating lambs
The ewes aborted
The sound of shot
Ringing the ear
The dropping body
That very fear
The work still endless
I see no end
My mind is tired
My hands, no friend
My back is broken
My soul as well
What once was there
Can never ye tell
This enduring toll
For those remain
Our fragile grasp
I must refrain
I feel forgotten
My woe not worth
The grief is same
The cost much worse
Give a wave
A shout
A hug
A holler
The year will better
I hope no bother
We must unite
Defeat the beast
For now I am
I need deep sleep.